Kissy-Kissy

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Sleep unable to find me, I lie naked under my sheets, a hand across my breasts, the other stretched atop my thigh.
The dim streetlight filters through my cotton bedroom shades and its shadows dancing on my ceiling are all I see.
For I know that when I close my eyes again, you’ll flood back in front of them. Like you always do.
In imaginings of those things soon to happen. Of ecstasy. Of this moment we’ve spoken of for so long, as those miles pulled us apart all that time.

it’s been a long time comin’
it’s been a long time comin’
i’m gonna stab your kissy-kissy mouth

My mind swirls with thoughts of the warm wetness of your mouth. How your kiss will leave me tingling and weak from my torso to my knees. How I’ll weaken in your possessive grasp. How I long to breathe you in and taste you.
And now, mere hours separate us.

it’s been a long time comin’

All those conversations about wanting. Promises made. Events foretold. Fantasies divulged. Talk, that’s all we’ve had.
And all of it to blame on my kissing you on a whim that night, moments before you left. When I broke that boundary between us. You surprised me. Overcome, you forced me against the wall, kissing me as if you were already penetrating me.
That night returns to me so often, stirring desires.

Sexy_B_W_013.sized

So many bitter-sweet memories of arousal. So many moments left satiated by myself, and never you. So many wrongs. So many regrets. So many things to make right.
And yet that night is all I recall.

it’s been
a long time comin’

How hard you felt. The way you pinned my arms to the wall, pressed into me, restraining me. The distant droning as your cab driver laid intermittently on his horn out there in that shadowy cul-de-sac, and despite it, you continuing to probe me intently with your tongue. The sound of your devastatated gulp when finally you knew you had to pull away.
The feeling then, knowing that a plane was to steal you away to London, where a year of university awaited you. Knowing that you were leaving me for that year with nothing but a kiss, a grope, and that feeling of being overpowered against a wall to tide me over.
And now, nothing but a jet over the Atlantic keeps us apart. In less than eight hours, you’ll be in my arms. Now, at the mere thought of you, my heartbeat collides upon itself in a cacophony of expectation and need.

it’s been a long time comin’

And now, nothing but a jet over the Atlantic keeps us apart. In less than eight hours, you’ll be in my arms. Now, at the mere thought of you, my heartbeat collides upon itself in a cacophony of expectation and need.

i’m gonna stab your kissy-kissy heart
04

The need to fuck you, the tease finally done. To have you within me — thrusting, holding, lasting. To finally know if it’s to be everything it was promised to be during those expensive, desperate, by-the-minute sessions spent gasping, wanting, yet denied, on the phone.
I know it will be. I knew it would be when I was pinned against that wall, wanting you as badly then as I do now. As badly as you clearly wanted me. It overwhelms me to think how that desire has since grown, and how forcefully you might take me eight hours from now. And how much I desire you to spend me utterly.
Never have I wanted a man like this, like I want you now.

it’s been a long time comin’

*The lyrics included are from Kissy-Kissy, a dirty blues-rock/punk ballad by a guitar duo fittingly from both sides of the Atlantic called The Kills. Live, this song was one of the most erotic, driving sexual things I have ever, ever witnessed. I felt dirty and abused at the end, and wanted nothing more than to not go home alone. The gentle licking of guitar strings and steady throbbing beat coupled with wistful, pained Velvet Underground-ish vocals tinted with a touch of PJ Harvey gets me hot every single time. The duo endlessly repeats the same lyrics over the five minutes, and it ebbs like the slow rhythmic cadence of two experienced, passionate lovers in no rush to reach their destination.

10 thoughts on “Kissy-Kissy

  1. Walking Wounded

    I like the way you use lyrics intermittently during the scene you weave. I think it works particularly well for someone like me because whenever I am involved in an erotic moment I always hear songs, instrumentals, etc. My friends joke around that I always have a soundtrack in the background of everything I do.

    This story reminds me of an encounter I had at a party at a dorm. Only we were able to sneak away and screw like rabbits in a shared bathroom. It was dirty, frantic but it did give me the taste of doing it in a semi public place which is kinda cool! I liked it. 🙂

    Peace

  2. The Snakehead

    Wow.

    This is so sensual it blows my mind away.

    It’s sensual, but not erotic. That’s the best part about it. It makes sex… beautiful.

    You make sex beautiful.

  3. scribe called steff

    WW — I use music with my writing, sometimes, the way a musician uses a metronome. The flow of this piece is very evocative of the song, so it played an integral part in setting the mood for me, too, though the song’s only 2 years old and this happened before that.

    Thanks for the comment.

    Snakehead — Wow, you make comments beautiful. Heh.

    I think the piece is both sensual and erotic, or I hope that it is. I just didn’t want it seeming cheap or tawdry, yet it had to show the passion that was remembered for a year. Many more than that, it seems.

    Anyhow, your comment rocks, so thanks. Makes me feel groovy.

  4. chunu

    You have a visitor coming shortly Steff, or just letting yourself go with the flow of the piece?

    There is nothing like a sensual kiss and nothing more to be an amazing tease of what iffing. Or even just the possibility of a kiss, as more often happens with myself.

    Wide smile here – as it is the middle of the day, and I have company at home, I can’t very well do much else.

    Great writing as usual 🙂

  5. Simply Her

    Do I ever know that feeling, of hours being apart from him…
    with a parting action realizing that he is going to be hours out of reach. The action of that single moment that you haveon replay every time you close your eyes. the want & waiting for the moment you’ll be together and the actions that might take place once you’re within an arms reach. sigh. all too familiar. <3

  6. scribe called steff

    Chunu — The piece is sort of hard to explain where it comes from, part fact, part fiction, but it’s ALL about desire. So. Desire it is.

    But for me, a kiss against the wall is sometimes all it takes. Why do walls have to be so evil? That pressure, the friction, the lack of escape. Such a turn-on.

    Thanks.

    Simply — You too, eh? Yeah. I’ve had one too many relationships that included departures. Long-distance love affairs don’t work for me anymore. Too much wanting and wishing. It’s hard.

    Of course, I don’t have a love affair right now, so what do I know?

  7. The Snakehead

    This piece or writing is 10,000 light years away from cheap you can’t even see it’s shadow.

    No, it’s not cheap. It’s exquisite.

  8. Anonymous

    Almost. It’s almost right. The kiss: right. The wall: so right. The feelings, the desires, mood: dead on.

    Only…

    It wasn’t he who ended it, it was me. Because it wasn’t London that stole him away… It was a wedding. His wedding.

    And so it won’t be. It will never be.

    I said I’d be silent, but I guess I’ll just be anonymous instead.

  9. scribe called steff

    Snakehead: Thank you so much.

    Anonymous: A riddle for me. How enticing. The wonderings are aswirl…

    Thanks for the tease. Always good.

  10. sirbarrett

    I must have missed hearing this song, but the words were so vivid that I could almost smell it.

    The photos are a nice touch.

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