The Failure to Fuck

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Not too long ago, an Italian man was ordered to pay his now-ex-wife damages for failing to disclose to her before they tied the knot that he couldn’t get it up.

Apparently the courts have told him he’s guilty of abusing her “right to sexuality.”

Now this is why I believe in getting sex out of the way. Pfft. I mean, wait? Yeah, that’s gonna happen.

But you gotta wonder: You’re abstaining, but you make out, right?

So, there you are, you’re makin’ out, gropin’ a little, wandering around, pressing together, getting all heated up… and you never once notice he doesn’t have a stiffy in response?

Honey, do you have any powers of observation?

What chick, getting kissed against a wall, doesn’t notice a guy’s degree of interest? Which chick doesn’t judge its rigidity at that time? And if the guy ain’t putting it out there in a covert yet obvious way? Something’s up, and it ain’t Dick.

Honestly, it’s a pity they’re divorced. They seem impeccably matched.