Without getting into it, “things” are confusing. The sex I thought would be regular thus far isn’t. Geography’s a bitch. So’s reality. It is what it is, baby. But that’s all right.
I can always count on myself.
So, without adieu, the reasons I love to masturbate — some of the many, many reasons:
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- I never have to schedule a visit. I always know when my hand is free.
- Rolling over and sleeping is exactly the right move, every time. Unless you’re surf’n’satisfyin’ on the tube/‘net.
- No concern about who gets the wet spot. I do. (In theory.)
- Doing laundry isn’t an automatic repercussion of experiencing the Big O.
- I can always meet my own expectations.
- Enthusiasm is a given.
- I don’t have to dress up in order to get off.
- The ultimate quickie: Satisfaction with a minute or so of effort.
- It’s free.
- It’s portable.
- It’s fun.
- When I can’t afford to pay for a massage, I can masturbate. Often.
- Keeps me in touch with myself.
- Reminds me that Catholic Church, for me, is like home: I can never go back. Sin is simply too damned fun, and remembering them all for confession would be far too labourious.
- It’s a healthy outlet for all my repressed societal angst.
- Nostalgia: The many, many times I’ve revisited that very same Happy Place, and every time I smiled.
- It’s better than watching golf on a Sunday morning.
- Stress management. They claim one orgasm has the neurological benefits of 10 Valiums. And cheaper.
- Because my carpal tunnel syndrome hasn’t crippled me yet.
- Because I can.
- Because I get to play with toys.
- Because.
I’m sure there are more reasons, but that would involve investing more time, and I could be masturbating instead. Priorities, right?
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13 Comments
Masterbating does so much good for the self and the world. I always take comfort in knowing that, i’f i’m not good at anything else in life that i’m a cock flogging champ.
I fucking rock my world.
besides, everybody likes a happy ending.
[cool blog btw]
All I can say is absolutely!
Not many things better than a bit of ‘self-loving’.
Have to admit I have been keeping the fingers and the ‘rabbit’ rather busy recently myself!
The sad thing is that there are people in this world who are ashamed or scared of pleasuring themselves. They are taught from an early age that it is a sin, forbidden, shameful… And this projects into their sexual relationships as well. Hence, I am installing a policy of “it’s okay, just close the door to your room when you need privacy” when I have children.
XNXX. Need I say more?
Lab Guy — exactly. Too many women don’t, for instance. I’m a big believer that women cannot fully enjoy their sex lives UNLESS they can satisfy themselves and ENJOY doing it. Fact is, sex can’t be enjoyed if inhibitions exist — and masturbation really eliminates those inhibitions.
Good comment. And yes, far too many stigmas are attached to masturbation. Somehow, too many people believe that masturbation is what the “unloved” do. Pfft. No, it’s what the healthy, sexually aware folk do.
Reach out and touch yourselves, kids.
As my mother always said, It’s OK to touch yourself as long as your hands are clean.
Words to live by.
To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance…
Great topic. D’ya think it’s possible to become too good @ masturbating? I think it’s absolutely essential for people to embrace onanism so they can have better sex with other people (nothing like discovering your own surprise erogenous zones). The flip-side is finding things that are amazing while DIY’ing, and then not necessarily being able to bring it up when w/ another person. That whole coming to terms w/ your own inner fr33k!
Being ashamed of masturbating is something to be ashamed of, as is not grabbing (!) every opportunity to give oneself a hand.
Hell Yeah!!!
CHELSEA: Yep, I quote that Oscar Wilde quote often. It’s awesome. Your mom gives good advice. :)
BARD: That’s an interesting question. I think it’s possible to become too dependent on getting off just one way, maybe. I’m not sure, but I’ll give it some thought. Interesting posting behind that question, methinks. :)
POSITRONIC: Yeah, but unfortunately there are too many world faiths that believe masturbation is a sin — Islam, Catholicism, et al. Too bad that most of our sexuality problems arise from religion mingling a bit too much in the bedroom. Real pity.
I wouldn’t say those folks who are religious have anything to be ashamed of, but they might want to rethink a god that has such petty concerns as to whether or not they can touch themselves, while so much other shit’s going down in the Cosmos, man.
W — I struck a chord it seems. :)
I only started masturbating this year and it has made all the difference in the world in my sex life. Yowza.
The ultimate rejection ?
When your hand falls asleep during masturbation !!! HO — HO — HO !
I absolutely love it and have done since I first experienced it centuries ago. I feel great after a long session with myself where I can indulge in my fantasies. If the day hasnt gone well I masturbate and that makes me feel so much better. My masturbating far outweighs the number of times I have had sex,even in marriage. It may appear selfish but I only have myself to please and when I want to.