Snap, Crackle, Pop? Could Just Be PMS

I had a little weepy moment at work when telling my bosses I’d need a day off for a funeral in the coming weeks, so they told me to take off for the day.

“I think it’s a sick day, Steff! Go drink a greyhound and toast your pal.”

GayBoy and I will do an impromptu wake later this evening, so that’ll be the theme. For now, though, it’s a movie and curry before an ass-kicking memorial ride for my departed friend, who was passionate about cycling.

But that’s what I’d like to write about — sports/athletics, and women.

I’ve known for a while now, thanks to my chiropractors, that women’s bodies do weird things at different times on their cycles. When I’m on mine, my joints pop in and out like a fuckin’ jack-in-the-box, man. It’s crazy. When I’m athletic, like I was last week, since I was on my period during my whole kamikaze intro to spring fitness, I really, really need to spend a long time stretching, or I could get really fucked up in a hurry.

And now science offers a definitive study that shows this link really does exist, and it’s not just new-age practitioners who buy the whole “hormonal disturbance” thing that a woman experiences on her period.

This is significant for women everywhere who can plan their schedules around their cycles and avoid potentially painful injuries

Rebecca Morrison
British School of Osteopathy

The study suggests the risk of injury is linked to fluctuating hormone levels which affect the muscles and ligaments.

Both tissues appear to be vulnerable midway through the menstrual cycle, while the ligaments are at greater risk at the end.

Midway through the cycle, the level of the female sex hormone oestrogen, which gives strength to muscles and ligaments, drops dramatically, resulting in sudden weakness.

I shredded my knee by picking up a piece of paper off the ground a couple years ago. I just twisted the wrong way when leaning down (it was recovering from injury at that time, almost healed) and rr-r-r-r-rrip! I felt it pop apart, and I was on crutches for 10 weeks after that. THAT was on my period.

Then again, last week I cycled around 100 kilometres, worked out 90 minutes, and did a lot of work with freeweights, so I’m obviously not suggesting staying home with a ring of garlic around your neck for protection or anything, all right?

Just sayin’, if you’re ever, ever going to take the time to stretch before and after being physical, make sure it’s when you’re cyclically most vulnerable. Learn this shit. Use it.

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