Yesterday became increasingly dark for me, even though I kept my good humour alive on Twitter in an attempt to keep my mind off things, so when my aunt called me in the evening to see how I was doing, I suddenly broke into the biggest cry I’ve had in a while.
I tried to downplay my financial worries and my fears, tried to be a bit more of a “man” about things, but it didn’t work out very well. I got off the phone and literally wailed, “I want my mommy!” It wasn’t one of my finest moments.
This morning she rang me. Her and my uncle are sending me a gift of cash to tie me over, as I’ve only ever been this desperate once before. I was so relieved I flat-out bawled yet again.
But yay for me. Yay for seeing that little light in the tunnel. Yay for my back feeling a bit better. Yay for maybe turning the page on the darkest part of my recent trials.
A lot still hinges on being approved for a loan, but I’m hoping that will work out too. Think positive thoughts of dollar bills landing in my bank account so I can go buy a new couch and mattress, and despite taking on more debt, lower my monthly costs by $400 or so, and then I will never have this “back problem” shit happen again. :)
(Once I rehab an injury, I’m so hardcore about it that it tends to never really affect me down the line. It’s all about the rehabbing, baby. Pain is gain.)
So, since it’s been a lot of gloom and doom this weekend, let’s lighten it up with a find I made when I was hanging a bunch of clothes yesterday:
My kilt from my Catholic schoolgirl years! I thought it was gone forever. Boy, did I ever giggle! (It’s pleated, plaid, but a little too long, and I’ll remedy that.) Now, the last time I wore it, I was a size 12 or 14 at the age of 13, so it’s still a ways off from fitting. But I’ve gotten from a 22/24 down to a 16 this year, what are the odds I can make a size 12 by around Valentine’s day?
I’m not huge on roleplay in all the standard-issue ways, but I do enjoy it sometimes, and I always love “play”. Getting dressed as a schoolgirl in MY old uniform for some guy I want to wow, though, that would be just so damned much fun.
So, now my kilt’s my “goal” outfit for the spring. Granted, it’s not likely I’ll wear it out much, but who needs to go out? The bed, the rope, the lube, the toys — that’s all at home anyhow, huh? Staying in is what it’s all about. :)