Of Backs, Writing, And Living

Sigh. Your little bloggeur has failed you, minions. No postings in nearly a week? Quel shame!

Unfortunately, she of said blog blew her back a bit on Sunday.

Yeah. You heard me. I gimped myself a bit. Fortunately, I had appointments for both chiro & physio within that 48-hour period anyhow, so my timing was superb. [In case you’re late to the party, I blew my back out significantly in October, weeks off work, on the floor, painkillers, etc.]

Things are settling nicely, it won’t be a problem. It simply is serving to show that all the stretching I’ve thought I was doing well, I was actually over-extending a bit on. Form, my friends, is everything. Hopefully I’m on the correct path now.

It was unsettling. I spent a lot of time with more than a little fear in the last three days. When you’re in a lot of pain and relatively immobilized, it’s like life is stolen from you. There’s very little joy to be found because every bit of movement or activity causes pain. That’s the life I had for nearly three months in the fall. I sucked it up as best I could, fought through it, and made it out.

The end of last week was my Triumphant Return. I cycled to work. I did the thing I’d been scared to do all winter. And I did it WELL.

And then it took my back out again. [Which is where it’s wise to remember that it seems I’ve been stretching wrong, but that it has now been resolved. Also, I’d gone too long between chiro appointments, etc.]

I was prepared for pain and setback in rehab. I am not surprised. I’m not even angry. I’m frustrated, but I’m also human. And yet I’m confident I’ll get past this.

But it’s why I haven’t written.

Sometimes it does a psyche good to write it out. Sometimes a psyche is best served, though, via one-foot-in-front-of-the-other coping. This week was one of the latter. Chill, stretch, keep your head in the game, don’t let it win, focus on the outcome, all will be revealed.

I wanted to write, though.

I’ve been doing better, eh? Getting my literary stride back a bit. I’ve been reading a variety of books of late and I think it’s trip-hopping the brain a little and getting me back into the art of language. I’m so enjoying that. Unlike so many bloggers who are trying to (rightfully so) make a buck off their blog, I keep forgetting the business side of things and, for me, it’s still just about the writing.

So when I’m not enjoying the writing, the point of the blog becomes a blur at best. Why should I bother blogging? I don’t do it for you or them or that or those. I love your feedback, I love your ideas and your response, but if I wrote only for you, then it really wouldn’t be very good. If I’m not inspired to do it, it shows.

And I have been ENJOYING the writing lately. It’s been fun. Except for today, today’s a “hi! I’m not dead yet” at best, but it allows us to catch up, no? But writing has been a hoot of late. And while I’ve not written this week, I have three postings in mind I really want to tackle in the coming days, and I think you’ll enjoy each. All three are sex-related. All three are both rant-ish and opinion-editorial.

This is promising: It’s the return of the Idea Pile. I haven’t had an Idea Pile in nearly three years, since I was writing At My Best Ever. Back then, I was so prolific I’d get more ideas than I knew what to do with. I had one of those bill stakes on my desk, and I’d write out a note for an idea I had, put a few point-form ideas, and jab it onto the stake. When I finally had time to sit and write and had nothing tugging at me, I’d fetch the stabbed idea notes, peruse, and choose one appropriate for the mood.*

All in all? Things are awesome. Well, okay, that’s reaching. Things are good. Very, considering it’s February. My love for writing’s rekindling. I’m taking chances with my back and winning/losing some, but at least I’m in the game. Spring’s on the rise. I have some exciting stuff on the horizon. And tomorrow’s Friday.

The gameplan is to write this weekend, but that depends entirely on how things unfold. I got Stuff going on. Stuff might change things. Either way, it should be fun. I hope y’all enjoy your weekend furloughs too.

*If you’re a writer and you don’t do an Idea Pile/Stake, you’re seriously missing out. It’s better than jotting ideas in book form, because the shuffling of paper kind of helps the creative process. It’s hard to explain. Keeping writing ideas in a book is stifling. Try the Idea Stake. Keep note paper and a pen near the TV too, just in case. Inspiration’s hard to come by, and even keeping track of ideas like this can prevent future blocks. A starting point is invaluable.