Rockin' – Not Humpin' – In the Free World

There was a lover’s quarrel on tonight’s episode of Rockstar: Supernova, and presumably on last night’s episode, as well, which I missed due to catching the fun of Clerks II at the cinema.
Jill is a pretty hot runt, she’s like 4’10 or something, but boy, you get her Italian angst firing and she might as well be six feet tall, man.
She won the rights to sing the Stones’ Brown Sugar with Supernova member Gilby Clarke (formerly of Guns’n’Roses, Heart, MC5, etc.) shredding some guitar. In her infinite wisdom, she thought it wise to, well, hump Gilby from behind while performing.
Gilby, and this fucking rocks, walked away from her antics. He strode towards the catwalk and got the hell outta there.
Then, the post-song comments were exchanged. Gilby said, “The only thing that really bothered me was the humping… Women in music today have sex, like that’s the only thing they can use. You have more than sex. I think it’s cheap, and it’s weak.”
Overnight, Jill commented that, “I think Gilby’s used to having Axl Rose up there, and it’s a totally different dynamic with a woman on the stage.”
She claimed that she did the humping as a means of getting her emotions out in her vocals.
Gilby retorted, “I played with Heart, two women, and Ann Wilson never had to stoop so low as to hump me to get her emotions out.
The next take from Jill was, I think, incredibly lame, but stay tuned for my opinion after the rehash. She said, “It’s rock and roll. Why is there a double standard where a woman can’t be up there and show her sexuality, but you guys can? You rip your shirts off and stuff like that.”
Gilby scoffed. “All the moves were predictable! I’ve seen it at the Holiday Inn, I’ve seen it everywhere!”
Gilby Clarke gets MY vote for feminist of the year, all right? Bang-fucking-ON, Gilby.
Any mainstream chick out there in rock and roll or pop or whatever is using their booty and boobs as much as their voicebox, all right? Don’t give me this “double standard” bullshit. There’s no double standard.
What he’s saying, honeybunches, is that he’s sick and tired of chicks who think they need to fuck their way to success. He wants talent to speak, not a twat. I’m pretty sure he also doesn’t want to be in a band with a guy like Tommy Lee and a chick who thinks grinding one out’s the only way to extricate her emotions.
If you have talent, brains, a body, and the whole fucking package – and she does – then let that speak. Let it wail. Let it send a blood-curdling scream into orbit. Don’t dumb it down or cheapen it by throwing some suburb blonde bubblegum “here, let me hump you now” bullshit into the mix. It’s trying too hard.
Since when was it only a display of sexuality when you reenacted sex? And why did I miss the bloody memo, huh? No one ever tells me dick.
Oh, right, because IT’S NOT the only display of sexuality! Fuck. That’s like suggesting the only way to be heard is to shout.

sub·tle (sŭtl) pronunciation
adj., sub·tler, sub·tlest.

    1. So slight as to be difficult to detect or describe; elusive: a subtle smile.
    2. Difficult to understand; abstruse: an argument whose subtle point was lost on her opponent.
  1. Able to make fine distinctions: a subtle mind.
    1. Characterized by skill or ingenuity; clever.
    2. Crafty or sly; devious.
    3. Operating in a hidden, usually injurious way; insidious: a subtle poison.

Dilana, who I’m a secret lesbian for (okay, well, no, but she’s got a fan here, man), can be as on-edge as anyone’s ever been, but she was at her sexiest when she was her subtlest, during her performance of Nivana’s Lithium a few weeks back where she just stood there, fucking STOOD there, staring straight ahead, and raging out the lyrics, her eyes emanating everything they had to, and her body doing nothing. It was so goddamned hot, man, so intense. Yet, subtle, baby.
Ain’t you ever fucked someone with your eyes? Ain’t you ever been fucked by someone’s penetrative gaze? Don’t you remember how goddamned HOT that felt? Yeah, well.
And that’s what Clarke’s saying. Let yourself do your talking – your talent, brains, eyes, pouty lips, the way you wiggle your ass. Don’t think you gotta fuck or hump or grind your way to whatever achievement you’re after, because if you start down that path, there’s not really any other route for you. Respect is a very tenuous thing. Do not be fucking with the respect you have; you may never see it return to you.
It’s really bloody cool to hear a guy get on a soapbox about that sort of thing, and I’m thrilled to see it in an arena like dirty, sexy rock and roll.
Have I mentioned how much I dig this show? Huh? It’s like crack, man. One hit just ain’t enough.

7 thoughts on “Rockin' – Not Humpin' – In the Free World

  1. Damnation's Cellar

    And what made Jill’s situation even worse was it wasn’t just a one-time hump. She followed Gilby around the stage like a puppy dog. “Wait… he’s over there. Must. Go. Hump.” Repeat ad nauseum. I haven’t watched last night’s show yet, so I don’t know who got the boot… yet.

    Am I the only person who thinks Zayra’s voice sounds like nails on a chalkboard?

    I’m firmly in camp Dilana myself.

  2. scribe called steff

    Oh, my god, she didn’t! How fucking high school can you get?! Oh, lord.

    I’m surprised but not at who was booted last night.

    And I don’t like Zayra at all, or Dana, or the Coldplay-esque guy.

    I was a bigger Lukas fan, but not so much now. Dilana’s the horse to ride for this one, methinks. ‘sides, she’s more mature and cooler than the rest.

  3. myself

    I’m personally saying Dilana all the way but I do love Dana’s voice. Sorry to those that don’t. Storm also intrigues me a bit, but she’s a little over dramatic for me.

    Zayra. She reminds me of Bjork and I want her gone and gone now. (not Bjork fan, can you tell).

    And that would be my assessment in a nutshell 🙂 No one else sticks out at all except Jill, but I have nothing nice to say about her except she has a face I would love to slap (that inner voice again…oooops sorry!)

  4. themarina

    I don’t watch. There just isn’t enough time in my bloody busy calendar. However, Heart freakin’ rocks!

    Good to hear about the cycle smashing too. Riding the emotional rollercoaster is never fun.

  5. Damnation's Cellar

    Okay… I watched it. The boot-ee was a little surprising, but the show wouldn’t be as much fun without the people we love to hate. I think they’ll keep Jill and Zayra around a while just because they add drama to the show. I think we’ll see some more of the less noteworthy middle-ground contestants go next.

  6. eccentrica

    I completely agree about it being much more erotic to be a bit more subtle. Humping and stripping off just looks really… desperate to me.

  7. Vixen

    I don’t own a tv so I have no idea what to say about the show. But your thoughts on sexuality and subtleness were right on. I have seen women be more sexual by just arching an eyebrow than another woman buck naked. It’s all attitude.

Comments are closed.