RANT: God’s Asked Me to Whale On Yo Ass, MoFo!

There’s a lot of attention being paid to polygamy and bigamy at the present, thanks to the arrest of that uberFucker, Warren Steed Jeffs. I know there are a lot of polyamorists in my audience, so I’m going avoid starting a war of words just because I disagree with the lifestyle.

(Disagreement does not equal judgment, so spare me the sanctimony, thanks! Do what thou wilt; just don’t invite me to the party.)

I want to say one thing, and one thing only.

CNN’s been showing these slighted polygamists who feel the world is up against them. (I may not agree with it, but I don’t think it should be outright outlawed, but that’s another argument for another time.) Naturally, the butthead I saw was excusing or justifying his lifestyle because he believes he lives that lifestyle in praise of God or as a means of being closer to God, or even because God wills it as such. Insert the justification you like best.

I am sick and fucking tired of everyone justifying their actions because it’s “God’s will.” No, people, it’s not God’s will. If you are religious, then you understand the simple premise of the belief that God gave free will to man so that man may choose and thus ultimately secure his own fate. You have chosen your lifestyle — whether it be that of a polygamist or that of a bake-sale/PTA mom. Don’t fucking tell me you’re doing it for God. Do it because you choose to, and have the balls to own up to choice, public opinion be damned.

I could turn around tomorrow and buy stakes in the best Belgian chocolate company in this city and scarf cocoa up my fucking wazoo, turning myself into some 400-lb ball of flab and say, “But God made the beautiful cocoa bean and I am simply choosing to respect the beauty of his creation by indulging in it! I’m doing it for God! My rolls of fat are a testimony to his greatness!”

Nuh-uh, sweetums. I’m doing it ‘cos it tastes so fucking good and I’m not getting laid so if that means I indulge, then I indulge. But it’s my choice, and that’s enough justification. “Because I want to!”

I’m really goddamned tired of people not taking responsibility for their actions. You’ve chosen. You live it. Be proud of it. Don’t tell me it’s for a God you’ve never had the privilege of sharing a beer with. You don’t fucking know what He wants, if in fact He even exists, so don’t presume to excuse your actions through Him.

A nation of pansies, that’s what this is. Fuck, man. God wills it, therefore it must be so. If that’s the case, then know this: God gave you a spine, but you CHOOSE not to use it, you fucking amoebas. Get with the program or check the fuck out, but spare me more of this bullshit.

(This goes for anyone on any side of the “God wants it” argument, whether Poly or PTA or Pro-Life or whatever. I’m just sick of the argument. Personal responsibility’s like some distant figment of the land over yonder or something. I, for one, think it’s time we remember what the hell it once meant.)

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This entry was posted in Battle of the Comments, Best of Steff, Current Events, Dimestore Philosophy, Hollywood, keeping it real, Lifestyle, Marriage & Other Commitments, Opinion (Editorial & Commentary), Politics, Society, Steff Rants and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Post a comment or leave a trackback: Trackback URL.

7 Comments

  1. Brian
    Posted August 31, 2006 at 3:07 pm | Permalink

    Amen…

  2. Hanh
    Posted August 31, 2006 at 4:14 pm | Permalink

    And there squats the toad. I could be completely wrong on this, but it’s my general impression that people have an instinct, not to accept responsibility. At least when the response is potentially negative.

    Little kid writes on the wall with a crayon, mom comes in, he points to his little brother. President gets a knob slob in the Oval Office and the first words out of his mouth (out of any man’s mouth when he knows he’s busted), “I didn’t do it.”

    I think Americans (can’t speak for Canadia) get raised on the concept of denial. The whole “innocent till proven guilty” thing gets permanently etched into our brains and we look for every conceivable and inconceivable excuse to prove that we’re innocent. A puppet to someone or something elses evil ways. (Or Godly ways in the case of polygamist.)

    I would try to go scrambling off into how non-married couples always seem to have back-up boy/girlfriends and that polygamists are just doing the same with a wedding ring, but I have to run back to school.

  3. Dark Horse
    Posted August 31, 2006 at 5:16 pm | Permalink

    Amen indeed. I’ve been wondering for a long time when people would remember that having rights is balanced by having responsibilities — the chiefest of those, in my opinion, to take responsibility for your actions. As they like to say in therapy, own your emotions, and consequently your thoughts and your actions.

  4. Nick
    Posted August 31, 2006 at 5:26 pm | Permalink

    Haven’t had a beer with him but’ve read his word. Never read where polygamy pleases him. Never read where you need to go around justifying your acts in his name.

    What I have read is that you should actually rejoice and delight in life’s troubles. Not, go around screaming “persecution”.

    I do know what he wants. He wants me to live a life of joy and delight. You don’t hear me going around screaming about my delight in him, I just live in it. The one’s you hear shouting have unfortunately got his message all wrong and are screwing it up for the rest of the world.

    It saddens me to see your comments about this Steff. Not because of what you believe or don’t believe, but because of the loud mouth assholes who got a little tv time and scewed the whole thing for you.

    Just like the beauty of the Yukon (or wherever it was) that had you feeling close to “a” God, a true believer’s life should be one which draws you in and makes you wonder “what is it about that person”. Sadly, these people rarely exist anymore. I can only wish to be that kind of person and you’d never know from some of my earlier correspondence.

    Maybe someday I’ll be a light in someones life and they’ll want to know what it is about me. It is then that I’ll stake my claim.

    peace

  5. scribe called steff
    Posted August 31, 2006 at 5:39 pm | Permalink

    Nick– I may not believe in “God” the way you do, but it makes me no less ethical, no less exuberant about life. Yes, there are a lot of extremist and fundamentalist Christians who piss me off, but they’re in all religions. Faith is no justification for intolerance, and yet it’s used as one constantly. It angers me, and this is the product of that.

    Funnily, I work with a bunch of Muslims now, and they’re wonderful good people. I in no way associate the actions of terrorists with the religion, but instead with overzealousness and a raping of a belief system to justify one’s own actions. It’s reprehensible no matter what God’s name it’s committed in.

    I long ago stopped believing I had to be within the four walls built by a man to praise my idea of God. I’ve long ago stopped believing I need any man on earth to tell me I’m living up to the standards of any deity. I know the morals I espouse. I know the ethics I live by. If any god takes issue with it, then I would see fit to take issue with him.

    I would never presume to associate irresponsible moralists like the ones I’m talking about with a religion overall. It’s too bad it always gets taken that way when one of us expresses anger at the misuse of faith. Sigh.

    DH — Good points. I agree.

    Hanh — As a Canadian, I can’t really argue what the American culture is without sounding like a bigot. I’ll let you do it. Heh.

    Like I say, I don’t think polygamy should be outlawed. It’s ironic to live in a “free” country where certain person’s freedoms are squelched because others see fault in it.

    I disagree with polygamy and suspect most people living that lifestyle cock it right the hell up, but then again a lot of straight married “normal” people make a mockery of that institution anyhow. Why the hypocrisy, huh?

  6. nick
    Posted August 31, 2006 at 6:32 pm | Permalink

    Steff, I’m with you on the misuse of faith. Can’t say it angers me as much as it brings me sorrow.

    Perhaps those you claim assume you associate irresponsible moralists with religion overall, are really just as angry as you and are only trying to disassociate themselves from these fools. Maybe you’re not actually being taken the wrong way!

    I’m sorry you were once made to believe you had to be within four walls to praise and that it was man who set the standards. This is not the God I worship, and he surely doesn’t “take issue” with me. He’s a little more mature than that. This is about love. If anything, he grieves when I’m not seeking him.

  7. Sharon
    Posted August 31, 2006 at 11:02 pm | Permalink

    Most days I do a pretty good job of maintaining my goddess-like Zen-ness. Today wasn’t one of those days. So midway through it I thought to myself, Screw it. I’m takin’ a ½ flex day! Who cares what my bitch of a boss thinks! (Ah the joys of self-employment.) Sure, it was self-indulgent for a work day, but who am I to question God, since he’s the one who told me to do it?

    So I hit “print” and indulged in a mid-afternoon candlelit bubble bath with a cup of cocoa and Steff’s latest rant. And true to form, Steff delivered the goods! Kudos, Girl. ;) I love your smokin’ quill and how you shoot it straight into the bull’s-eye.

    And, hey. *shrug* If someone makes poly-amorous inquiries — whether verbal or spelled out in seductive pantomime, a nice-turned-naughty game of scrabble, or the execution of a highly optional Twister maneuver — what can you do but take it as a compliment? We’re fabulous, Darlin’! Can’t blame people for noticin’ the basic facts.

    I was on the verge of being offended the first time I was asked to be part of a ménage a quatre, until I realized that judgment is always the forerunner to offense. So I just smiled, politely declined and slipped back into my warm fantasy wherein I meet an intimacy junkie and we ride off into the sunset together to shoot up on monogamy.

    What’s tough to not take offense at though, is when you turn someone down for “Drive-Thru Sex” and they try to guilt you into it with: “Come on, we’re all adults here … ” (Nothing like a little litigious banter to set the mood, eh?) *Rolling eyes* Is it just me or does resorting to bully-sex not exactly reek of dignity? On the upside, offering to buy the bully a hooker for the evening has proven effective on more than one occasion.

    Well, keep that quill smokin’, Steff! I really appreciate coming in here and having you rant away for me so I don’t have to break a sweat doin’ it myself.

    S.

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