Tag Archives: Twitter

Rehashing The TweetStream

  • WAHOO! @catherineomega fixed all my server issues that have been cocking up my WordPress blog. I's glad I fed her. Brain fuel! #
  • WALKING AWAY FROM THE COMPUTER NOW. Must stretch, sleep, get up in 5.75 hours. Fuck. Work! Then acupuncture & a 3-day weekend. I'll live. 😀 #
  • Goodnight, world. #
  • Screw you and the horse ya rode in on, Morning. But since you're a Friday in disguise on what's my 3-day long weekend, you can live. #
  • Cdn SYTYCD Judge to a male dancer looking to make the finals, dancing in a Tarzan-like loincloth:
    "Only if I can borrow the dress!" #
  • RT @mr_tits_pervert Riding the new CanadaLine this morning, handing out free Starbucks coffee coupons. Look for the green apron!! #
  • My carpool calls, 6:22am. I answer, "Aww. You're not running late?" "You want me to be?" #
  • "Yeah, noon's good." #
  • Woo, off to Broadway via Canada Line from Yaletown–three minutes!! Wow. #
  • Amazing. Used to schedule 1-1.5 hrs for a workday doc's appt, and now I'll be able to do it in 35-45 min. http://twitpic.com/emvub #
  • Walk your broke ass AWAY from the bookstore, Steff. #
  • Acupuncture: How to Be a Human Pincushion, demonstration by Steff, will now be taking place in Room 201. #
  • OMG, so glad I'm busing! My acupuncturist put about 30 needles all over, and I'm relaxed but disoriented. This'll be interesting. #
  • A roadside motorcyclist's memorial near home that I'd never noticed before: http://twitpic.com/enhsi #
  • iHome, iPeed, iHappy. #
  • H-o-l-y s-h-i-t! The landlord I love to hate replaced my leaky sink, & dude who did it did a beautiful job & cleaned the cupboard for me! #
  • One of my best friends just joined Twitter, yay, it's @Two_Wheeled, another of my friends-for-15-plus-year types. 🙂 #
  • Maybe now when I wash a sink full of dishes, a puddle won't run out into the middle of my wee galley kitchen. How enthralling! #
  • Tomato salad and bread, wine. Nothing else. Too tired, lazy, and happily complacent. A damn fine night to be chilling home alone. Yay! #
  • Book + Deck + Wine = Noticing my proverbial cloud with its silver lining. Blustery from where I sit. Me likey. http://twitpic.com/eo77k #
  • A nap is required before I can/will finish my glass of wine. Really, I don't mind. I'm selfless like that. #
  • [WHIRR]
    (Dustbuster roars, stops)
    (Steff stares at limp giant moth)
    "Gonna fly now? Huh? No Rocky Theme for you."
    #NotABuddhist #
  • TIP FOR MOTHS: Do NOT go gently into thy good light, even if it is a pretty stained lamp in the window, for Steff has a Dustbuster. #
  • Morning, world! I should be pissed that I'm awake at 7 on my 3-day weekend Friday morning, BUT… I fell asleep at 11 and got EIGHT hours! #
  • My Big Goal this weekend: To find some nice stretch vinyl to recover my scooter seat with. It's as tattered as my pride is riding it! #
  • YAY for action! Fuckheady The Garbage Truck Driver who BACKS UP with his alarm screeching for TWO BLOCKS prompted me to call his dispatch. #
  • I was polite but communicative, and they're gonna have a CHAT with the dude. #
  • My iPhone doesn't always come up to full brightness all the time. Disconcerting. Thinking of taking it back. I should, right? #
  • Living in the same hood as your best friend doesn't lose any coolness as time passes. 8 years & I still love @mr_tits_pervert dropping by. #
  • #Translink, your process of getting bike lockers for the #CanadaLine is about as 1982 as it gets. I have to MAIL a CHEQUE in? Really? #
  • Who has cheques anymore? How does one do this "mail" thing? Seriously, can't you hire a programmer, get an online app, & credit card/debit? #
  • The Lord of the Rings–New Zealand man finds his wedding ring at sea after 16 months. Determined! Romantic. http://bit.ly/q7d9e #
  • #Vancouvertweetup SATURDAY at 5, to cycle to Rmd Night Market on the new bridge! Pls RT. http://bit.ly/ggbjz #
  • Hatching a plan to make a tandoori pizza later with Turkish lamb sausage from Oyama's. Now that's some serious fusion fitting of beer. #
  • [Sending psychic vibes out to the whole of Vancouver — now is NOT a good time to take your children to Superstore, moms. Thanks!] #
  • Ooh! My juju-voodoo attempts worked, no screaming crying kids at Superstore! Note to self: Next time telepathically request hotties to shop. #
  • Gee, #FIDO, I'm sure to have a fantastic weekend now that you've fucked up, DIDN'T cancel my preauth payment, and withdrew $600 from me. #
  • ASSHATS. #
  • "We can refund it but it'll take 20+ days, by cheque." Oh? Or my BANK can take it back on Monday. ASSHATS. You don't have a COMPUTER? #
  • We now bring you to the emotional eating part of my day. All I've had is about 200 calories today, so way too much stress on empty tummy! #
  • Eggs, hash browns, bacon, and toast. What I used to consider a "good" breakfast back in my bad old fattyer days. #
  • Emotional eating, for the tummy win. #
  • Countries where women think domestic violence against them is acceptable: http://www.feministing.com/archives/017314.html #
  • Yay for sunny nights. The skies are parting, as is my mood. I shall get a ride in later on, after my fat-fat-fatty breakfast settles. 🙂 #
  • Win a new Canon 5DMKII (or $2500 Gift Cert) from @OPGear & Scott Bourne. Pls RT. Details here: http://bit.ly/BqU8N #photog #
  • I haven't had a big hashbrowns-eggs-toast-bacon meal in a long time. I'm all sluggish now. Trying to get psyched to cycle in this k-rad sun. #
  • K-rad. Snicker. I wanna watch Bill & Ted or something now. DUDE. If anyone says "gnarly" to me tonight, I'm gonna fall down laughing. #
  • I am off to reckon with my fatty 3:00 breakfast, cycle the new Vancouver skytrain bridge's bike path, & soak up a little sun. Pics to come. #
  • I have a giant cow-pattern pill-shaped beanbag that's about 4-5ft round that I'll sell for $50… http://twitpic.com/es915 #
  • I've overestimated how much the clouds had parted. Some of these are opening up. Time to PEDAL soon methinks. http://twitpic.com/esbfi #
  • The new skytrain has awesome hands-free cycle parking onboard. SHERRY! #
  • That was supposed to read SHWEET, but iPhone trumped me before I noticed. Sigh. #
  • Having a foodie antisocial night tonight.Gonna make an "Indian" pizza, then some fudge later. Test-batch for a party tomorrow. #
  • I've just made fudge… before dinner. Bittersweet moment. I thought this recipe died with my mother 10yrs ago, & found it 2 wks ago. 🙂 #
  • I haven't licked one of these fudge spoons in at least 10 years. Awesome. #
  • Caramelizing onions for a first attempt at "Indian" pizza — garlic naan, tikka masala, leftover tandoori chicken, onions, peppers, feta. #
  • My tandoori-tikka masala-naan "pizza", and if it's any good, I'll post the recipe. http://twitpic.com/esyz7 #
  • Tandoori-masala pizza with beer, for the motherfucking win! #
  • "More," the belly demanded.
    "As you wish," said its head. #
  • My tandoori chicken pizza recipe has been posted. Hope you like it too. http://smuttyeats.tumblr.com/ #
  • OMG, my brother and dad are stopping by all impromptu. WEIRD. But, okay. 🙂 Gotta clean up. #
  • Dad's all proud I've been posting photos of bookshelves he made, on Fcbk, & people've been raving, so he wants to see how good they look. 🙂 #
  • So I guess I'll move the book about sex off the kitchen table before Dad takes a seat in 20 minutes. WHEW. Thank god I'm tidying. #
  • Nice seeing my brother and dad for a change. We haven't been able to connect much in the last year, just an hour visit, but it was nice. #
  • My fudge was a fail — but I'm sure I blew the sugar measurements. I'll try it again tomorrow. 🙂 #
  • My dad, a lifelong contractor, was BLOW AWAY by the "iHandy Level" app in iPhone. LOL. #
  • I'm enjoying my night. Keeping it simple, real, lazy. Is good. Nice to show my new decor to fam. Approval is fun. 🙂 #
  • There's a feeling of an autumn come too soon on the night wind. I'm fumbling for a blanket, with the lights low. #
  • Watching Style by Jury and getting al misty eyed. I love it when the makeovered folks have a life-altering epiphany then live BOLDLY. #
  • Up early, tackling the laundry. This being-human-but-not-rich thing is a REAL DRAG when I gotta do Cinderelly shit like this. #
  • But I don't have much of it to do. 😀 #
  • I require nuts for fudge. I'm off to the store. Get my fudge & laundry done, then I can relax for a few hours before cycling & party. 🙂 #
  • Making my version of the $3.95 greasy spoon breakfast. And black-as-night coffee. #
  • Nibbling my still cooking hash browns is exciting. Using "Smokey Carribean Rub" from the Edible BC Store on GranIsle, by Maple Leaf Spices. #
  • Mm, coffee, you complete me. #
  • I wish my vehicles were made by the people who make TV vehicles. Those have indestructible suspension! No one ever slows for bumps! #
  • The light is suddenly growing rich and warm. Clouds are cooperating. My place feels alive with colour. Love it. Time to write, methinks. #
  • But whatever to write about? #
  • I gotta make fudge. This song's perfect: slow-building, ends intense. Awesome. Grant Lee Buffalo for music geeks. http://tinysong.com/7DFC #
  • God, I hope this works. Threw out my measuring cups in the great purge & forgot to buy. Winging the fudge: http://twitpic.com/evp9y #
  • The texture is much better than yesterday's fudge attempt! Yay. Brown sugar-walnut fudge dusted with sea salt. http://twitpic.com/evtqr #
  • What is it that makes eating the fudge or cookie dough from the containers they're made in so much more fun than the finished product? #
  • Nomnomnomming this pan and spoon to death. Fudge is yum. #
  • TONIGHT'S CYCLING TWEETUP IS CANCELLED as the only person who'd committed can't make it. 😛 #
  • Thank god, it looked like there was more left in the fudge pot than I thought. I think we'll be all right without a stomach pump after all. #
  • Oof, even that bit of fudge is too intense now that I don't eat much sugar in my old age. Holy shit. How my mother scarfed it down, I dunno. #
  • Headache. Laundry's four floors down. Folding that, then a nap. Lazy Saturday begins NOW. #
  • I love how SYTYCD Canada makes a big fuss over "why" they've chosen to look in X city. Hello? It's Canada. There's, like, 6 cities of note. #
  • Best "review" of "Fresh whole rabbit" on e-Bay, http://bit.ly/d4p5w
    (orig via @colleencopick) #
  • Ooh. I was hoping I'd get 30 or so pieces of praline for the party tonight but I think there's more than 50. Yay. Here's to deceptive pans! #
  • Oh, headache, you're so stupid. #
  • I know *exactly* what my headache needs: A muscle relaxant, a brown ale, toast, and cheese. #
  • Beerdrinker, heal thyself. #
  • When someone is on transit in latex gloves, I worry. http://twitpic.com/eyag2 #
  • How do you fit 35 people into a 500 sq ft apartment party? Intimately. #
  • I finally kicked the unruly @hummingbird604 and @colleencoplick out of my home. Some people. 🙂 #
  • So bacon cures hangovers, eh? Hmm. #
  • Oh, how cute. Friendster is still emailing me updates sometimes. Oh, the nostalgia one feels from visiting their "spam" box. #
  • Finally getting my kitchen cleaned after all my cooking yesterday. The migraine hit and stopped all progress. THIS is better. #
  • When walking around in flip-flops makes a sound like you've walked into a spanking parlour, you know your floors need cleaning. #
  • Not flippy-floppy so much as smacky. I blame the pralines-making. Sugar is EVERYWHERE. #
  • Dropping a glass and catching it 4" before the ground? YEAH, BABY. I've missed my calling, I should've totally been cast in The Matrix! #
  • I seem to recall once being able to write funny stuff. Time for an experiment! Can one go home again? Rather, can one go funny again? #
  • I think I've talked my world-travelling 75-year-old aunt into getting an iPhone. That will just crack me up. #
  • Very slowly getting into finishing what I started yesterday. Hydrating. Gonna take a late day bikeride. I'm jazzed. It's a good "me" Sunday. #
  • Correction: It's a fucking awesome Sunday. Is yours? 'Cos it's a choice. #
  • Grooving. Not cleaning so much as productively dancing. Bop-bop-shimmy-shimmy. #
  • The best most overplayed song ever, Lust for Life. Bop-bop shimmy-shimmy bop-bop-bop. Bop. http://tinysong.com/6XDV #
  • Just cleaned my cream-coloured leather furniture for the first time in months. Gleams. Soft. Lovely. Time to stretch, chill, then ride! #
  • WOW. #Vancity ROCKS. They reversed #Fido's wrongful automatic withdrawal of nearly $600 within 24 hrs when Fido said it'd take 20 days. #
  • WAAAAY too slothlike for a bikeride. Taking a nice sunny walk around the hood instead. And finding onions, etc for burrito-making. #
  • Freaking out, lost my wallet. This wasn't the turn my day needed. Hopefully it's in @COlleenCoplick's car or @julesjulesjules' place. #
  • Sigh. No wallet with @colleencoplick and that leaves one hope. Naturally
    I lose it on the rare occasion I have WAY more than $20 in it. #
  • -Can I get a cheeseburger, no pickles, that's all, to go, please?
    -Is that everything?
    -Yeah, that's all.
    -For here?
    -To GO.
    Sigh. Service. #
  • Majorly grumpy mood now that my wallet's gone. Just didn't need this right now. Of course it'll pass but it's still shitty TONIGHT. #
  • Filling for chipotle black bean & chicken fajituritos (burrito meets fajita) I'm assembling tomorrow for lunches. http://twitpic.com/f2njy #
  • Super-duper-spicy chipotle burrito filling, for the win. Tomorrow I make Spanish rice and a little fresh salsa, and put them all together. #
  • Should be about 12 burritos for about $20, with really healthy, non-processed ingredients. Easy healthy lunches for the win. #
  • In my fragile grumpy state I am embracing my inner whiny self and watching a snivelly teen drama, Save the Last Dance. And I'm okay with it. #
  • Life's difficulties always seem so much simpler when watching melodramatic teen movies where even homeroom is a catastrophe. #
  • BUTohmigodifhedoesn'tlikemeIwilljustDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIE. /end teen movie simulation #
  • It's been a topsy-turvy weekend; at least I still get to chill with Le Red Wall. The gift that keeps giving. http://twitpic.com/f31ab #
  • The top 20 in SYTYCD Canada rock. There's about 7-8 I'm already a fan of. Yay! #

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Why I (Love to) Hate Facebook

There I am, second-last day of vacation, scouring my deck and cleaning my deck chairs. I bought the chairs about eight years ago now. As I scoured them down, a flood of old memories came back — drinks drunk as planes soared in across the southern horizon, headed for the airport’s runways, conversations nattered until wee morning hours with faces that still bring a smile to mine, silent moments spent alone or with others, like one sunny perfect beautiful morning spent with a coffee and a flawless and strangely-quiet empty horizon before finding out a couple planes had earlier crashed into a building and changed America’s future.
It’s just a chair. A measley little chair I see out my window every day, and yet when I really crunch the memories as I scour it down from up-close, a world I’ve lived through in eight years come washing over me. It’s just a chair. Wow.

Imagine if everything had that kind of conjuring power? But then I log into Facebook. Continue reading →

TwitBits: Why, if I were a spud

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t think I was funny, but the truth is, I *do* try. I don’t have a lot of writing in me these days, but the banter on Twitter is good fodder for keeping me in the game. Some days are better than others. Here’s from today, all from before work in about 30 minutes (except the last two, written after my ride home) after I had an annoying visit on Facebook. Some days I have it, most days I don’t. It vanished on me as soon as I got home. Sigh. Poof.

_______________________

  • Woman, fuck, you and your Facebook quizzes. I’m no longer blocking THEM, I’m blocking you. “Are you a potato?” No, you’re fucking BLOCKED.
  • Who has the time to take a quiz to decide whether or not they’re a POTATO? What, are you STONED 24/7? I know potheads with less time. Continue reading →

Why I Don't Follow You On Twitter

I tweet incessantly on Twitter. Most of us know this by now.
I also, inexplicably, will hit 1,300 followers probably before the weekend is through. I follow little over 300, quite a few of whom don’t follow me. Whatever.
So why don’t I follow you? Well, it’s not about you, is it? It’s about me getting the most out of the experience for me. It’s about me enjoying my time on there. Not making you happy in Nantucket or whatever. This is my gratuitous fun time, nothing more. Continue reading →

Woe is You? Oh, ho! Woe is US!

I’m giving a few people a stay of execution on Twitter.
Soon, the unfollows will commence, as I seek to find new folks to fill my ADHD hours with.
Who’s in danger of getting the axe? Anyone who keeps whining.
See, I’ll bitch. Bitching’s good. I encourage rants and bitching. I even encourage being argumentative and incendiary. (Obviously. Look at me!)
But if all you’re doing is whining about how the latest inconvenience in your life is, well, an inconvenience, or you’re moaning about what a loser you are, or doing the whole existential pity-party “Why me?” bullshit, well, I could probably be filling my cyberspace better.
Why you? Because it’s your fucking turn. Like it was for me for 10 years. Because that’s the way the cookie crumbles. Because, for the REST OF YOUR LIFE, you will experience inconveniences, tragedies, and heartbreak. Because that’s life. Because it takes thick skin. Because you have to want it. Because you have to FIND the good shit in the middle of the tough shit. BECAUSE. Because. Continue reading →

Things I Said: Further Raided Tweets

Sadly, boys and girls, I’ve been working overtime. Six days last week. All 9+ hour days this week, plus physio, massage, and dentist appointments. Before the weekend. And don’t get me started about that.
So, I’m stretched thin. Obviously. The blog thus suffers.
Tonight’s posting, therefore, is the doesn’t-require-brainpower option of copying some of my Favrd/Favrotted Twitter comments of late for your chuckling pleasure.
Could be worse. I could just be boring the shit out of you with “Oh, woe is overtime. All that money, so little time” crap, but I have decency.
Besides, recycling is good for everybody. Without ado, then, a selection from the last week or so.

______________________

  • Ever wonder what kind of social pariah you’d be treated like if you worked as a salesperson on the Home Shopping Network?

As an effort to reduce the control commercialism has over me, I practice individuality by eating my red Smarties first.

  • Tragically, kids, we’ve reached the saddest part of the morning: Steff needs to put on clothes. You may collectively sigh now.

I’ve played Jenga drunk way too often. Walking past unfinished skyscrapers unnerves me. Continue reading →

The Things I Said: Raiding My Favrd Tweets

If you still don’t know what Twitter is, it’s like a live chat version of the Facebook status update. People will often just write random shit, but the trick is, doing it in 140 characters. Quel tricky. It’s a strange community. You can ‘star’ or ‘favourite’ the ‘tweets’ you like best.
If you star stuff, then you should also sign up at Favrd. That way, your favourite sayings will get logged, and the person who said it gets a little notice as a result. It’s a nice thing to do, Favrding your faves. Nudge, nudge, hint. Poke. Y’know?
I had no idea I was getting stuff “Favrd” on Twitter. How cool is that shit? People put little gold stars next to the things I say. I feel so speshul! Watch me blush.
I have to admit, some of this stuff cracks me up when I think it, so when I find out someone, anyone, got a laugh out of it or dug it? Makes me feel awesome. So here’s some of what people liked that I’ve said. Brace yourself!

_______________________________

The fella next to me on the bus either wears Rotting Apple cologne or he needs to clean out his bag. Rimbaud would approve. Me? Not so much.

  • Bet no one wants to talk to the shouting bearded As-See-On-TV guy at parties. “BUT WAIT, there’s MORE! A martini bar! It’ll get you drunk!”

Homelessness is always sad, but it’s sadder in hard November rains. Continue reading →